This tour is entitled “Bone Deth Gypsy Tour” … not your regular pack of weirdos, more so a handicapped van full of dirty bike slingers trying to compact as much riding as possible in seven days around New England during the most microwaveable week of the summer. The team consisted of myself, Shajn Ferbert Raines, Kevin Botsch, Karter, Chris Crawford, Brian Histand, Taffy, Dean Burrito, and the photographer Jeff Allen. The trip was slime based. You can’t tell in any of the photos because we don’t want to give away the Dig Magazine article, but we brought containers and buckets of Nickelodeon-style gack to slime babes and bums along the way. The hot stink of riding BMX in the New England humidity, combined with a van full of melting slime is not the slightest bit easy on breathing. We spent a lot of time in New England so, fortunately, there wasn’t much driving involved.

We started in Stamford, CT. Not a whole lot of good living is happening in this city, a dead zone of memo pad business parks and Motts Applesauce headquarters. Although, for BMX, the dead zone is good for getting things done and firing out cocoa bango stunts. Brian killed it with a full speed leap over a laundromat building.

We ventured up to Springfield, MA, which is another Dead Bite city of slow brained beings. It was, by far, the hottest day of the trip, feeling like microwaveable diapers had landed on the van. This city had the slowest feel, but another provider for rad spots and bust-free places to ride. We spent the night in a spider-infested basement, all waking up to multiple bumpies and scratchies on our skin. Curse those damn flesh eaters!

The following day we rode Holyoke, MA, which felt like a zombie town. Everyone there had to be on some type of hallucinogen – in my mind at least. Almost every person stared us down like they’d been on a deserted island for months and we were bacon sizzling on a frying pan. Licking their lips, sniffing the air, and heavily panting as they walked towards us.

After we left the bacon zombie town, we rushed straight out to Boston to meet some friends and get some more filming done for the tour video. It was weird being on a tour yet being at home, but made for best ’cause we got some sweet slime footage for the intro. Initially we were supposed to be going to designated spots, like a few skateparks and trails, to meet up with other teams and do demos and crap, but we kind of ignored that and just slimed some babes.

Although we did make it to the last stop of the tour at the skatepark in New Haven, CT. All the other teams we met up with looked like they’d just trekked out of the amazon river for 2 months, and we just looked regular, except for the fact our van stunk of slime buckets. The tour DVD will be available in a month or so, keep up on bone deth (www.bonedethbmx.com) for updates.

Thanks to Lip Service for the sweet jeans, keep on keepin’ on and stay solid gold, 2 million dollars.
- sean burns

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