Posts Tagged ‘Horror Chic’

Story by: Dan Barrett

As the calendar date shifts towards the 24th of November, people across the United States are make their pilgrimages back home to reunite with their families in order to celebrate the great turkey holiday. Their thought dials are set to tune in only to feelings of intimacy, festivity, and gluttony; and they no doubt eagerly await the anticipated merriment promised with the holidays. They are completely unaware that a mutant strain of influenza type A virus subtype H3N2 has re-emerged a hemisphere away in the Australian coastal city Brisbane, similar to the incident in 2008. Unfortunately, a cargo ship loaded illegally with infected turkeys was launched for the USA three weeks prior to the holiday…

The freight ship docks in southern California on November 8th. The workers unload the turkeys as planned and transfer them rapidly to slaughter houses. The day following the allocation, the dockhands experience headaches and sore throats. The abnormally cold weather is blamed. The turkeys are redistributed into packaged goods and sent to stores and markets a few days later. Some farmhands begin to notice dark spots on their body, but no apparent pain or discomfort. Business continues as usual. The turkeys make their way to myriad sectors of the country, and on their journey the meat comes into contact with uncountable additional shipments of good. The first full blown cases of the H3N2 outbreak happen in rural, sparsely populated areas and go generally unnoticed by the populous. Several families in North Dakota are admitting to the hospital coughing up blood and bile, typically with black spots littering their skin. A man in Wyoming with similar black spots is brought to a clinic with bleeding from the eyes, mouth and anus. By the time thanksgiving arrives, it is too late to contain the tempest of disease. Families across the country lay out their meal platters and begin to feel their flesh crawl with plague. Mothers begin to rend and tear at their skin to alleviate the hellish itch. Children cough and spew blood all over the table, filling rooms with the heinous contagion. The plague’s advanced form rapidly shows the signs of a viral hemorrhagic fever and leprosy. A child’s skin hardens and he peels away at the scabs; a man drinking wine collapses into his mashed potatoes as his lungs fail. Twins are driven into a berserk state and attempt to use a carving knife to remove the other’s face. A woman feels her entrails slide out of her body in a slimy stew of bile and acrid stench. There is no escaping the pandemic, it is carried by the birds and they are flying overhead now…

Happy Thanksgiving!

BIRDEMIC

She’s draped in lace and bones and something else you can’t put your finger on. Is it the distinct scent of death? This highly fatalistic look, styled to remind us of our own mortality in these uncertain times, borrows liberally from authentic plague doctor beak-shaped protective masks while adding some fresh ingredients to the mix such as feathered posture collars. The latter serves as a tongue-in-cheek tribute to our avian friends, which might or might not eventually be responsible for our extinction. Meanwhile pink ruffles trimming the Nocturnal Rendezvous Shrug which faithfully mirror the distinct fanlike folds of intestines provide a literal take on organic fashion. Go on. Catch the twenty-first century plague with Vanity Kills.

• Historically, plague physicians were suited in head-to-toe waxed leather cloak or gown-like garments designed to protect the wearer from exposure to life-threatening germs. Completely enshrouding the body was standard practice, and in the spirit of concealment I’ve taken great care to ensure that no bare skin was left exposed by attiring myself in a posture collar (to cover my neck), black gloves (to keep my hands from coming into contact with who knows what) and a floor length skirt. Since the amorphous, tent-like silhouettes of genuine plague doctor wear are not what I consider to be very conducive to femininity, I focused on adapting other attributes of the aforementioned medieval ensembles – namely the waxen texture of the over-garments. And so I fended off contamination (while bringing it to YOU) by choosing shiny, black pieces such as the Nocturnal Rendezvous Ruffle Shrug #38-116 and an equally slick underbust corset.
• Behold the blood glistening against a medley of caged guts and snow white feathers. You don’t personify a disease without toting around an accessory that boldly proclaims “Hi there, I’m not sidestepping subtlety; I’m running it over with a bus”.
• I opted out of the traditional wide-brimmed hat in favor of “bird’s nest”-like hair, complete with a small raven surveying the terrain from amidst the chaos on my head. The partially disguised presence of an ebony plumed pestilence carrier provided the finishing touch this “pretty in plague” outfit needed.
• Dem Bones cami top #56-296 and a floral lace button down blouse boost those style antibodies.
• I have a confession to make. I wasn’t always a fan of those “super creepy plague doctor bird masks”, as previously noted in Plague Widow. Something about that long-snout, just didn’t sit right with me. Inexplicably, that same eerie sensibility that initially turned me off drew me right back in, because it’s hard to resist adornments fashioned with a poxy lady in mind.

In conclusion, let us give thanks for making it another year without being wiped out by a global pandemic.

Obligatory Disclaimer: No live poultry was “fowled”, harmed or otherwise made uncomfortable for the sake of capturing these images. Not unless you count a tacky feather boa sacrificed to the photo Gods. The swine guts were purchased at a supermarket and if I didn’t use utilize them for artsy purposes, in all likelihood they would’ve wound up as someone’s dinner. I have no qualms about “bimboing around with pig parts” (Thank you Bud Bundy for that great quote), but I’ll never go as far as retrieving them from a live pig. Even if it’s a member of the Kardashian family.

Be sure to check out 2010’s take on Thanksgiving terror here.

Credits

Photographer: Stevie Oh! Photography

Model: Vanity Kills

Location: Letchworth Village, NY

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Vanity Kills

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Dr. Ray D. Ayshun & Eyeleen

Story by: Dan Barrett

That he was once a doctor of a stature which could be considered noble is arguable. If you were somehow fortunate enough to find a past colleague, they surely would deny the knowledge of acquaintanceship now. For the (perhaps we can say) ‘good’ doctor shall only be known for his madness and perseverance in the arcane. He was testing something in the evenings, when he was alone beyond the watchful eye of peers, and the thing backfired on him. Some kind of radiation attached itself to his skin and melted it from the inside out. Unfortunately the dear doctor was not lucky enough to expire during the ordeal, but instead was forced to watch himself become rather mutated and corrupted by the amorphous foulness seeping onto his flesh. After the incident he came unhinged, or perhaps simply exhibited the full breadth of an inherent lunacy. Loathing himself, he retreated to a crumbling estate on the edge of the world where he feverishly stalks the countryside.

Eyeleen

So disgusted was she by the foulness that had overtaken her brother, she could no longer bear to look at his abhorrent, charred countenance. But the vision was of so hideous a degree it had become absolutely etched into the very retina which bore her sight; the only lasting solution was to destroy them completely. The act achieved, covered in molten blood and filth, she fell deep into an abyss of pain and torment. The grotesque objects of disdain had been removed, but the grave reward was to be trapped in a boundless void of formless horror. She clutches at the detested eyeballs, trying to find a way to rend them from this plane and erase all the horrors they have seen.

Matthew 5:29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.

Inspiration List: Twisted Porcelain Dolls by Jessica Harrison, St. Lucy (Christian martyrdom makes Hostel look like The Little Mermaid), Bill’s desire to shoot with Michael since “he’d make an awesome psycho”, the “Lyme Disease House of Walpack” and nonmedical use of antique wheelchairs.

The REAL Tortured Souls of New Jersey.

… The house is free, but the ghosts are extra.

The mood is that of antique-tinged insanity as fashion and violence march hand-in-hand by the way of bandages steeped in crimson fluid, colorways cast in bloody tones and truly eye-popping accessories.

• Much like a supremely elegant funeral, the #49-237 Blacklist Ruffle Dress Shirt and the #38-532 Duchess de Sade II Danse Macabre Victorian Mourning Skirt, both seen here in the blood colorway, bestow somber overtones upon the wearer, creating tension and discomfort while remaining well within the parameters of propriety.
• Disembodied eyeballs and soiled gauze up the ante on creepy.
• A heart cameo corset bridges the gap between structured and insane.

• Playing doctor is no fun in a coat that isn’t generously punctuated by sanguine splatter.
• In this “rivet rendition of Phantom of the Opera”, the most instantly recognizable standby of industrial culture sits perched upon the putrefied physician’s shoulders. Faithfully shielding his disfigured features from prying eyes (though they sure as hell won’t be his sister’s). And yes, ladies he IS single.
• Dr. Ray D. Ayshun’s makeup was applied using the technique previously seen in Blood Harvest and Springtime Sacrifice.

Note: Christian martyrs make some of the goriest Halloween costumes. Just sayin’.

Special thanks to: LA Mike (seen here in the role of Dr. Ray D. Ayshun) for laying on the most disgusting mattress known to man and falling through a couch.

Credits

Photographer: Bill Tracy Photography

Models

Dr. Ray D.Ayshun: LA Mike

Eyeleen:Vanity Kills

Location:Walpack, NJ

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Vanity Kills

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Springtime Sacrifice

Story by: Dan Barrett

A prequel to Blood Harvest .

Tonight we will return to the bizarre southern town whose presence was spoken of before in these very pages. The place’s name has been long forgotten by urbane folk, and neither local map nor road sign will lead you to it. Prior to the civil war, the area had been a respected farming community for generations. However, at some dark turning point in history, not long after the war, an unknown epidemic hit and all but cleared the place out. No one is able to speak with certainty of these events, as whatever shadowy occurrence that took place was never written down, and all but erased from the collective memory of mankind, which is likely a blessing. The native folk have their rumors about the place, of course, everything from nuclear testing site to alien abduction. The most disconcerting claim, perhaps, is deep in the woods there is a doorway to hell itself, and the demons found a way to come through it, back into our world. It was these things which eviscerated the town, scared off the settlers, and forged a fear so deeply seated in man’s psyche he was forever mute to speak of them. However, you didn’t come here to listen to fables or old wives tales. You want to know the truth, no matter how abominable…

——

What follows may sound like little more than a rehearsed work of the macabre, to be placed on a library’s bookshelf in between similarly penned commercial tripe, but I can say with absolute authority it is quite a bit more than that. If my story sounds ghastly and warped, it is for good reason. I’ll tell you of that which you pursue, a glimpse into the blackened abysses of sincere horror and depravity, but you must promise never to seek it out for yourself, for nothing good will ever come of it!

About 10 years ago, in the summer of 2001, several friends and I were taking a car trip down south to an anime convention. Things were normal, until we started having car troubles. We pulled off on a random exit from I-65 and drove around the countryside for a bit, looking for some kind of service station. After twenty or thirty minutes of driving, the passenger side rear tire snagged a tremendous nail in the road and blew out. At that point, we were effectively stranded in the middle of nowhere; the car out of commission and no town or maintenance area in sight. After some deliberation we decided to follow a nearby trail up through the forest, in hopes it may lead to a development, or, perchance, a lone mansion of some aristocrat attempting to escape the bustle of the metropolis. As luck would have it, we came across what could loosely be referred to as the former, though it bore very few of the qualities we were expecting. The woods had opened up into vast farmlands, with many acres to the east consumed by corn stalks, and the west occupied mostly by an apple orchard. In the middle of these were some residences, though I couldn’t imagine people willingly called these shacks home. But strange folk have equally strange customs, as we would soon find out. There were 5 of us, and at this point we were all together as a group. Nominally, it was Joey, Matt, Blake, Lawrence, and myself. We were equal parts confused and nervous, but with no other options on the table, we decided to proceed and try to find someone with a phone, or vehicle, or … something.

Once we got into the central part of the, I suppose you could say, “village”, our fears were assuaged somewhat when we saw there were inhabitants. Unfortunately, none would return our attempt at dialogue. Perhaps they lacked the ability in general, as they seemed to do little more than pace about aimlessly and make low grunting noises. They did very little to even acknowledge our presence. At that point we split up; Matt, Joey and I went to check out the large saltbox style building which looked like some kind of mayor’s mansion, and Blake and Lawrence went to investigate a charcoal colored oblong structure which might possibly hold a store or marketplace. Blake was kind of an asshole, but it’s still unfortunate my last words to him were “meet us back by the corn in an hour”. We never saw the two alive again.

From the foot of the porch steps we stared upward at the house’s bucolic cedar casing. It was quickly clear our team’s exploration was a bust; the intricately carved mahogany doors were excessively worn and bolted shut, and there were no visible signs that the place was being used at all. The windows were obscured by layers of dust and the distortion of age. Defeated, we returned through the village to meet up with our friends and, hopefully, hear of their success. Sadly, there was to be only a swan song. On our way back we spotted the corpses of our companions, mounted on the side of the wilted building they were assigned to inspect, impaled through the necks. Their chest’s had been ripped open through some horrific feat, and from the gaping hole viscera, blood, and bile spilled out and was pooling on the ground below. The lumps of flesh and skin had become a minor ant colony to some bestial mutation of the common insect; the workers of the brood tearing it asunder and retreating to horde it in their dank subterranean tunnels. The bodies were an awful sight, and smelled terribly. A malicious crow had perched on Blake’s shoulder and was pecking out his right eyeball, the nerve of which was still loosely chaining it in place, producing small spouts of blood and greyish ooze. The gore had driven us both to sickness and the beginning stages of dementia, but I scarcely believe I hallucinated any of what was to follow.

From the darkness beyond the door-less, pine-framed entrance, a figure, straight from the bowels of purgatory, emerged. In appearance, it bore a strong resemblance to a human woman, but its wild look and aura was that of pure evil. While the rest of the denizens wore ripped and tattered farming clothes, the woman was wearing an antiquated Victorian garb comprised of a long dress and puff sleeved top. It had deep, vile red hair and the eyes of a hell-spawned succubus. Its lower face was drenched in carnage as blood poured from its open mouth. In its terrible, claw-like hand it held the exhumed heart of one of our friends! The woman spoke in a crude, sordid language interspersed with fragments of English. Apparently the villagers understood this bizarre dialect and, as beckoned, descended upon the three of us. The details of what happened next are not too clear to me; I was given a blow to the back of the head and I woke up sometime later in the midst of the apple orchard. Upon waking, I noticed I was lying on my back in the middle of a large symbol that had been etched into the ground. To either side of me, the fiends had restrained my friends and were mutilating their faces with aged carving knives and rusted cleavers. Their leader, the demon woman, was holding a heart aloft and chanting in some malevolent banshee language towards the sky. I gathered I was in the midst of some kind of ritual sacrifice, our bodies given in bloodied exchange for a plentiful crop (and very likely the same bodies and blood were going to be used for fertilizer). Though woozy, the sight of my buddies’ tortured, skinned faces blasted enough adrenaline to my nerves I was able to spring up quickly and dash back into the darkness of the forest. Whether I evaded them or they chose to let me go I will never know, but they did not re-capture me. I do not plan on finding out what their true motives were. So let this be a warning to you; it’s best to keep your distance from the foul backwoods.

Fashion that will tear your heart out (The tear your soul apart cliché was already taken by movie adaptations of Clive Barker novels).

• The slightly standoffish quasi-Victorian puff sleeves and corset laced back of the Black Diamond Dynasty #38-643 Victorian Jacket reflect your status as a cold, stern-faced yet charismatic creepy cannibal cult leader. While alternating shiny and matte black stripes and neckline trimmed with pleated ribbon flaunt its unabashedly feminine flourish. Leaving the term “heart stopper” open to interpretation more so than ever.
• The Black Diamond Dynasty 238-300-003 Mini Skirt easily holds its own, with those enticing peek-a-boo flashes of shimmering industrial netting sandwiched between layers of striped black PVC. Layering it over a lengthy, two-toned crinoline makes for an outfit twice as nice. The airiness of the cascading purposefully exposed underskirt, sporadically punctuated by a sudden flash of orange, adds dynamic movement, breaking up the dreary near head-to-toe blackness.Plus it’s hard to look at a multi-tiered orange and black flounced hemline petticoat and not think of decadently delicious edibles, such as pumpkin chocolate torte. Just writing about it brings on an uncontrollable craving for sweets. I suppose any garment with the power to cause inexplicable urge to eat your heart out whilst indulging in pastries and cupcakes is inherently ladylike.
• Strongly resembling the skeletal remains of a once robust wide brimmed hat, this unapologetically oversized spiderweb fascinator, can likely be seen from Google Earth. Sporting millinery this exaggerated in diameter, is somewhat akin to strapping a really, really glamorous satellite dish onto your head.
• Strategically mangled black “zombie” umbrella in lieu of typically frillier-than-thou gothy parasols.
• Within the context of a goth wardrobe, black PVC is, in essence, considered a “neutral”. And a great corset is the equivalent of those “Best Jeans for Your Butt” that women’s magazines devote countless articles to. Therefore, a truly well-crafted black PVC corset will carry you through just about any ensemble (from frou frou formal wear to Feindflug tees). Invest in the best and reap the benefits for years to come. That means NO $14.99 plastic boned lingerie “corsets” from Hong Kong based E-bay shops. The so-called plastic “boning” will bend as soon as you sit, yielding some rather unflattering results.

Retro Ripper

For detailed instructions regarding the construction of victory rolls please refer to El Chupacabra.

What I’ve learned about victory rolls in the past year:

• Hot rollers really ARE your friend.
• Freshly washed hair however is a dreaded foe. As is hair that is too greasy.
• Using the same brand of hairspray as select cast members of Jersey Shore will tame those unruly frizzies and flyaways. Hey, if that shit can cement their ridiculous blowouts in place as they Guido about in Seaside, then it will freeze your rolls in place as well.
• If you fuck up over and over and over again, placing a large flower in front of the less ahem…victorious roll will cover your shame. If the occasion (or your ensemble) allows for it, hiding the wonkier of the two rolls under a style appropriate hat will do the trick as well.

Lady is a Ghoul

The mistress of eerie-monies’ fervent desire to feast on precious your internal organs is reflected in the glint of her darkly iridescent, silvery black eyes and a mouth packing a generous dose of the macabre.

General Prep Work

You will need:

Moisturizer, Primer, Concealer, Matte liquid Foundation, Foundation Brush, Translucent Powder, Powder brush, Eyeshadow primer

1. Wash your face with a cleanser formulated especially for your skin type. Rinse thoroughly and pat dry with a soft cloth. Prep your skin with moisturizer before applying concealer in order to ensure a smoother, flake-free application.
2. Before proceeding any further, allow your skin to properly absorb the moisturizer. This should take about 10 minutes.
3. Since foundation worn alone often has a nasty habit of settling in the fine lines around your mouth, near your eyes, and on your forehead, I highly recommend using a primer after you’ve moisturized your face. Utilizing a small amount of primer helps to fill in unflattering expression lines, pores, and scars, thus allowing foundation to actually do its job!
4. Nix blemishes and skin discoloration by gently patting concealer over the trouble area. Follow by blending with your ring finger.
5. Apply a matte liquid foundation which best matches your skin tone to your face and neck with a foundation brush (a full dome shaped brush works beautifully). Start by applying small dots in the center of your face and then moving outward.
6. Set everything in place by finishing off with a thin coat of translucent powder. Use a full, round shaped powder brush for optimal results.
7. Prep your lids with eyeshadow primer to neutralize the colour of your lids, which in turn makes for brighter more vibrant shadow. It also prevents said shadow from creasing.

Eyes

You will need:

Rounded edge brush, iridescent black eyeshadow, metallic silver pigment, ivory eyeshadow, fluffy shading brush, eyeliner brush, black mascara

1. With the help of a rounded edge brush, apply iridescent black eyeshadow to the outer 1/3 portion of your eyelid, starting at the lashline and extend it slightly past the crease. Repeat the process on the inner 1/3 portion of your eyelid. Leave the middle 1/3 of your eyelid bare. Clean your brush prior to undertaking the next step.
2. Fill in the middle 1/3 portion of your lid entire eyelid area with metallic silver pigment applied with a clean and slightly dampened rounded edge brush. Starting at the lashline, yet again extending the shadow slightly past the crease, taking care to blend into the edges of the black shadow you added in Step 1.
3. Highlight your browbone with ivory eyeshadow applied with a fluffy shading brush.
4. Dab a small amount of the same iridescent black eyeshadow you used in Step 1 onto an eyeliner brush. Line ¾ of your bottom lashline starting at the outer corner of your eye, slowly making your way toward the inner corner.
5. Use a hint of silver pigment to line the remaining ¼ of your bottom inner lashline in an identical manner.
6. Curl your eyelashes with an eyelash curler and top off with 2 coats of black mascara.

At the Mouth of Madness

I used the same technique previously outlined in Blood Harvest to apply a papier-mâché mask to the lower portion of my face and neck. I find that adding three-dimensional texture to my skin causes the fake blood to adhere better. Unlike the blood splattered chest you see in Blood Harvest, I opted to stipple shades of cadaverous grays mixed with petroleum jelly onto the dried mask, leaving out darker colors such as black and red. The latter would’ve given me too much of a burn victim look, which wasn’t what I was after in this instance. I would alternate between applying a mixture of 1/3 petroleum jelly and 2/3 paint onto my face with a medium sized paintbrush and adding a heavy coat of translucent powder until reaching the degree of corpse-like pallor my heart desired. The translucent powder also helped to blend the edges of the mask into my own skin.

Following almost an identical DIY blood formula* I posted in Blood Harvest, I cautiously added some gory finishing touches onto the raised parts of my papier-mâché masked face. Using the same medium sized paintbrush I used to apply the cadaver grey shade, I carefully painted my face and neck with small amounts of fake blood. I don’t recommend dousing yourself with the stuff if you plan on wearing something that you don’t want to ruin (like my Black Diamond Dynasty jacket).Since paintbrushes allow for a more controlled application, you run less of a risk of trashing your tops, and subsequently raising more than a few eyebrows the next time you drop off your dry cleaning. Naturally, I highly advise that you undertake this messy procedure wearing as little clothing as possible or at the very least whilst rockin’ something that once belonged to The Ex. Oh and don’t forget to always allow for ample drying time :)

*I omitted the oatmeal.

PS! Did you know that March 2011 marks the 3rd anniversary of yours truly blogging for the Lip Service webzine? Tis true. I authored my very first blog entry for Lippy in March of 2008.

Credits

Photography: Maura Housley

Model: Vanity Kills

Location: Martinsburg, West Virginia

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Vanity Kills

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It’s usually fun and exciting to be a princess; it’s something pseudo-magical that people (usually girls) aspire to be. You get to live in a large castle, eat fancy food, wear overly-expensive garish clothing, and generally do whatever you want. However, this all ended for me when I was 17. That was when my mother, an important queen, died and her throne was usurped. The old and terrible Madame Frontenac, who took over the monarchy, cast me, being the only living bloodline to the rightful queen, down to live in the depths of the rotting, abyssal basement.

The disused shithole had always been off-limits to me during youth, and it was readily apparent why. Firstly, the stench of the entire place was face-melting (and not in the yummy MDMA laced baked goods way, either). Secondly, the place was dimly lit and covered with dust & cobwebs. Thirdly, there simply wasn’t anything to do down here. So, not only was I bored and trapped indefinitely in this dismal catacomb, but all my fancy clothes, save for one party dress, were revoked and given to the Madame’s obese, repugnant daughter.Not like she even fit them FML.

I lost track of time nearly immediately, since there was no way to tell the fluctuation of light from the outside world. Every so often, a maid would bring me some food and, occasionally, some cleaning materials, since my title had apparently been downgraded from princess to basement janitor. “Princess Bea” was now, and seemingly forever, “Janitor Bea.” Cleaning this ill-used compound was degrading and, as time passed, I harbored a growing resentment towards the evil Madame Frontenac, wishing only to escape so I could see the look on her face while I relieved her of her head.

For months there was no hope of retribution; that is, until I discovered the ancient wooden door, hidden behind a decomposing dresser. The door led to an unlit hallway, which appeared to spiral down into the infinite black nothingness of the earth and smelled like a sewer. At first the door was of little significance, until the C.H.U.D came. The door was, in fact, the gateway to the kingdom of the cannibalistic humanoid underground dwellers! The C.H.U.D were very frightening in appearance, looking like mutant humans with glowing yellow eyes. They seemed unable to talk and, instead, made strange and terrifying grunting sounds. However, despite being utterly ghastly, they did not try to harm me. Instead, it was quite the opposite. The C.H.U.D would come out of hiding and gather around me like happy forest creatures while I did my chores in the basement. Eventually, the C.H.U.D adopted me as their own Princess, and my title was upgraded from “Janitor Bea” to “Princess Bea, Queen of the CHUD”.

The C.H.U.D were also angry at the Madame, who I assumed had something to do with the creation and subsequent imprisonment of the C.H.U.D, and they were willing to help me exact my revenge; for the C.H.U.D had tired of eating rats and rancid scraps of the underground, and they desired to dine on human flesh. When the time was right, we smashed our way out of our stygian tomb and set about reclaiming the fallen palatial abode. While the hired help were paralyzed by fear of the hideous mutants, the C.H.U.D dismembered and consumed them in vile and non-PC ways. These fiends from the dungeon depths quickly overran the castle and made short work of its inhabitants, all except for the Madame and her corpulent crotch fruit, who they trapped in the throne room.

At last I was set to have my revenge. I commanded the C.H.U.D to do away with the daughter and they set their ravenous teeth to her, ripping her limb from limb until not but a bloody pulp remained. For my own satisfaction and as payment for my banishing, I tore the Madame’s head off her very shoulders with uncanny C.H.U.D-inspired strength. The pleasant howls of the sated C.H.U.D. filled the blood-soaked room. I held the severed head above me at length and declared myself the proud and mighty Bea, Queen of the C.H.U.D.

For Mine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.

The Abbatoir Aristocrat

Tattered cloth juxtaposed with pearls and restrictive corsetry make for fashions worthy of a present-day princess with a taste for both the refined and the macabre. The girl who’ll rip out you digestive system, have it bronzed and use it as a tiara rack.

Constructed from sexy sheer layers of ravaged fabric, the SlasHer Girl’s Long Sleeved Shirt gives a raw edge to even the most frilly sugarcoated layer cake of a skirt. As if it were tailor made for a true queen of the underworld whose ultimate storybook happy ending is laden with severed heads.

Shred your shirts, not your dignity. A black PVC underbust corset works double duty by providing curvage and coverage simultaneously.

*Insert pearl necklace joke here*

Har har har…now that we got that out of the way…

A strategically placed accessory typically associated with all the trappings of the upper class softens up the slashed n’trashed top and lends an echo of cultivated beauty to your reign of glamour and terror. Stick to a single strand of pearls or an off-centered jeweled brooch for an air of lady-like elegance. I said ELEGANCE. Did you catch that? This means don’t pile on all the bling you stashed in your accessory drawer at once.

If you find traditional royal headwear to be too MySpace-scene-kid-tacky for your discerning tastes, pin an oversized purple leopard print lily into your lush locks instead. Look the part of a princess, not a royal mess.

A black petticoat trimmed with purple ribbons and ruffles worn in place of a skirt is truly befitting for nightclub royalty who love to flaunt their flair for the dramatic. And so, the next time you’re faced with the daunting dilemma of figuring out exactly what a girl should wear to a formal garden party, thrown in her honor by grotesquely deformed sewer dwelling creatures, go with the crinoline. Skip the overskirt. Some garments technically classified as underwear are just too pretty to remain hidden.

What’s this? Floor-sweeping skirts aren’t exactly your flavor? Try one of these short, but still decidedly sweet alternatives currently in stock on Lippy’s website right now:

Style #73-300-001 Ghoul School Voile Mini Skirt in the Black/Purple colorway.

Style #83-3-02 Victorian Mourning Side Zip Layered Mini Skirt in the Dark Purple colorway.

Glass slippers might’ve worked in Walt Disney’s adaptation of Cinderella, but you’re just not that kind of princess. Fetish meets fairytale in the form of black PVC knee-high boots laced with alternating black and purple satin ribbon. Guaranteed to stay put on your feet before, during, and after the ball.

Bone printed stockings showcase the pride you hold in your majestic and dignified man-devouring C.H.U.D heritage. For the C.H.U.D are a proud and noble race.

The updo is DEAD! Long live anything but…

Unless you favor the PedoBear-approved kiddie beauty pageant contestant look, I’d say that it’s time to give those overly crispy curls shellacked on top of your head a rest. In the kingdom of Lethal Style, loose waves hold court. The creation of which I’ve previously discussed in further detail here.

Alternatively, you can try this no fuss quick n’ painless straightener method:

Or pay some nice people in Hong Kong to send you a wig :)

Royal Blush

De-prissify dainty pinks and pastel purples once and for all with a punch of charcoal. Y’know, in case you were secretly worried about looking like an Easter Egg.

General Prep Work

You will need:

Moisturizer, Primer, Concealer, Matte liquid Foundation, Foundation Brush, Translucent Powder, Powder brush, Eyeshadow primer

1. Wash your face with a cleanser formulated especially for your skin type. Rinse thoroughly and pat dry with a soft cloth. Prep your skin with moisturizer before applying concealer in order to ensure a smoother, flake-free application.
2. Before proceeding any further, allow your skin to properly absorb the moisturizer. This should take about 10 minutes.
3. Since foundation worn alone often has a nasty habit of settling in the fine lines around your mouth, near your eyes, and on your forehead, I highly recommend using a primer after you’ve moisturized your face. Utilizing a small amount of primer helps to fill in unflattering expression lines, pores, and scars, thus allowing foundation to actually do its job!
4. Nix blemishes and skin discoloration by gently patting concealer over the trouble area. Follow by blending with your ring finger.
5. Apply a matte liquid foundation that best matches your skin tone to your face and neck with a foundation brush (A full dome shaped brush works beautifully). Start by applying small dots in the center of your face and then moving outward.
6. Set everything in place by finishing off with a thin coat of translucent powder. Use a full, round shaped powder brush for optimal results.
7. Prep your lids with eyeshadow primer to neutralize the colour of your lids, which in turn makes for brighter more vibrant shadow. It also prevents said shadow from creasing.

Eyes

You will need:

Eyeshadow Primer, Eyeliner that matches your hair color if you draw your eyebrows in, Makeup sealer (optional), Black eyeliner, Violet pigment, Charcoal pigment, Light pink eyshadow, Frosty off white eyeshadow, Eyeshadow brush with a round/tapered edge, Blending brush, Fluffy eyeshadow brush, Eyelash curler, Black Mascara

1. Prep your brows by filling them in with a pencil and softening the lines with a small brush or drawing them in if you don’t have them. Eyebrowless ladies like myself should make sure to use a pencil that matches their hair color. After you’re satisfied with the shape of your brows, feel free to seal them with a single coat of a makeup sealer. Last but not least, lightly coat your entire eyelid area with an eyeshadow primer, to build a smooth base for your shadows, pigments and liners.
2. Apply clear adhesive tape starting at the outer corner of your eye and extend to the end of your eyebrow. Press down gently with your finger to smooth it out. This little trick gives your eyeshadow an extremely pronounced hard edge, which creates a clean and defined shape.
3. Take an eyeshadow brush with a round/tapered edge and wet it a little. Dip your dampened brush into the violet pigment and gently tap — DO NOT SWIPE — the pigment across your entire eyelid from lashline to crease. Don’t worry if you get excess pigment on the tape. Once you’re done with your eye makeup and peel the sticky stuff off, I assure you that any messes you might have made will magically disappear.
4. Using a blending brush, add some charcoal pigment to the outer crease of your eye and bring it down to your lashline on the outer corner of your eyelid. This is also known as the “outer V”. Blend into the violet pigment from Step #3. If you shave and draw your brows on, you can extend the pigment past your crease and onto the lower part of your browbone, since you obviously have more room to work with. Once again, ignore any fallout that might have ended up on the area you previously taped off.
5. Starting at the inner corner of your eye, using a small fluffy eyeshadow brush tap some light pink eyeshadow outward toward the “V” of charcoal you applied in Step 4. Blend into the violet pigment you added in Step #3. Eyebrowless girls and boys have the option to extend the pigment past the crease and onto the lower part of their browbone the same way they did in Step 4.
   At this point, the outer part of your crease (and parts of your browbone if you’re brow-less) should be lovely shade of charcoal, while the inner part should be a light pink. Blend both shades into each other at their meeting point, which should lie somewhere at the halfway point in the crease of your eye.
6. Clean the fluffy eyeshadow brush you used in the previous step. Sweep some frosty off white shadow directly under your eyebrows (doesn’t matter if they’re drawn on or natural). Blend the frosty off white eyeshadow into the two colors that you’ve blended into your crease in Step 5, the charcoal and the light pink.
7. Line your bottom lid starting from the outer corner of your eye, slowly making your way toward the inner corner with your favorite brand of black kohl eyeliner. Most of the color should be concentrated in the outer corner. I find that it’s easiest to put on eyeliner after eyeshadow and before mascara. Curl your eyelashes with an eyelash curler and top off with 2 coats of black mascara.
   Now would be a good time to remove the tape and admire your eyeshadow blending skills!

Cheeks

You will need:

Blush brush, Rose pink blush, Bronzer, Highlighter

1. Swipe some pressed bronzer onto your blush brush.
2. Starting mid-cheek, going towards your ear, apply the bronzer into the hollows of your cheeks using short, up-and-down vertical strokes. Darker shades will give the illusion of the hollows of your cheeks receding.
3. Now, using the same technique, add a rose pink blush to the apples of your cheeks, which will cause them to protrude. Use translucent powder to blend between the two colors in order to avoid obvious lines. This ain’t Ru Paul’s Drag Race, where such things might be more acceptable.
4. For added glow, blend a small amount of highlighter powder into the tops of your cheekbones. This will enhance the definition of your bone structure.

Lips

You will need:

Rose pink liner, frosted fuchsia lipstick

1. Use a rose pink lip liner to fill in your lips, starting at the center of your natural lip line and moving toward the outer corners. Filling in your entire lip area will not only make an excellent base for color, but it will also prevent the bleeding and feathering of your lipstick.
2. For some delicious lips reminiscent of sugary baked goods, grab your frosted fuchsia lipstick and beginning in the center of your upper lip, gently press the tube into the flesh of your lip and then proceed to roll it over the entire top lip area, working toward the edges. Repeat the process on your bottom lip. Being spotted with lipstick on your teeth is considered a major beauty blunder! Prevent potential slippage by placing a finger in your mouth, closing your lips around it and then removing said finger. This will remove any excess lip junk.

Photography:Alas Vera

Model- “Princess Bea: Queen of the C.H.U.D”: Vanity Kills

Location: The terrifying basement of my old apartment in Buffalo, NY

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Vanity Kills

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